I haven’t seen you for so long.
Which explains why I haven’t been so strong.
Until now, I’ve realized that the little girl waiting by the bay window was patiently hoping the tall figured man would come and take her for an adventure.
Sooner or later she’ll see he’ll never enter.
This will soon lead to another lecture.

She didn’t realize that the last time she’d see him was really the last time.
Not talking or seeking one-another for 18 years had felt like a crime.
This figured man was her “father”.
He broke her like glass that trembled with water.
She became so fragile and sensitive.
She struggled with trust and hope, which added to the negative.

There was no father figure that could be there to hold her when riding a bike for the first time.
No father to be protective of her at such a prime.
No father to make her smile and laugh.
No father at all to support her and her other half.
It always felt like something was wrong.
She was stuck in the dark for so long.

He made her lose sight of things like being okay with loving someone deeply and truly.
Because of this she lost sight of everything.
Every time they were supposed to meet, he never came through and left nothing but silence;cruelty
She’d always ask “was it me, was it my brother and sister’s”-but it wasn’t .
She grew without him, alone like a tree.

So, she prospered into something he couldn’t see
A girl who is beautiful, smart, and for once-happy.
I am that girl-happy yet snappy.
I didn’t want to blame you now that you’re gone.
I didn’t want to explain how I felt like I was a pawn.
If I’m being honest I just want to forgive rather than forget.

So, I write this poem for you.
For you I say goodbye, to let go, to be something more than upset.
Because of you I’m someone new and I thank you.

Published by: Ariana B.